How To Take Care Of Yourself Mentally When In A Demanding Relationship
Relationships are different across different people, especially when you realize people get into them as individuals. Couples have to foster the relationship and constantly be in a phase of developing each other, which can make the relationship a bit challenging.
This is all the more so when couples reach a point of transforming it into a demanding relationship, for various reasons. This doesn't mean it's over for your happiness and mental health, however, as there are ways for you to maintain your mental health while in a demanding relationship.
What's perhaps interesting to hear is that divorce rates in the United States have actually started to decline since its 40-percent peak back in the 80s. In fact, nowadays, the chances of a first marriage going up more than 10 years were 70-percent of men and 68-percent for women. This means, it's really possible to maintain a healthy marriage over time - but it doesn't mean marriage or any relationship can be perfect.
Getting It To Work: Mentally Coping With A Demanding Relationship
With the above taken into consideration, it's important to remember that being in a demanding relationship doesn't necessarily mean it's completely over for you and your partner. You've got to tackle this situation with precision and care in order to come out of it much stronger. Read on to learn more on how you can achieve that:
- Be clear with your expectations in the relationship: A relationship is often branded as "demanding" usually because of a lack of being clear with expectations. Sometimes, your idea of a relationship can be vague that you won't know that you and your partner actually pertain to two different concepts, and this can make your relationship unbearable even if you don't want it to be. Communicate your concerns, your demands, and your needs to your partner and vice versa. Don't resolve on anything yet - just identify your primary issues. This at least allows both of you to identify just which parts of the relationship you've understood or not.
- Be firm with what you're willing to compromise or not, and try to find common ground: With both your desires and wishes enumerated, try to find common ground as to how you want these to be met. Is there something you can't provide? Is your partner okay with this? What can you offer in recompense? Relationships are about compromise, and the best kind of negotiation is one where both parties leave the table slightly disappointed. But at least you've found of way to find mutual ground on what you can and can't do in the relationship.
- Find breaks for yourself in order to get in touch with your thoughts: Make sure you spare a few minutes or hours of the day and/or the week in order to make sure you get yourself grounded into reality and rediscover yourself. Take time to reflect and take everything in order to allow yourself to grow and find better ways to resolve your present issues. This also allows you to take a break from everything.
- Try to indulge on things you and your partner love doing: When you know you're in a demanding relationship, and if you've followed the steps above to identify what makes it so demanding, perhaps another course of action to take care of yourself mentally is to constantly remind yourself what makes the relationship so awesome. If demand comes from busy schedules, make your dates count. If your partner feels jealous of others, try to slowly help them expand their social circles so they can cope with your situation much better.
- Get yourself professional help to assess the situation: If you feel as though parts of the relationship not only make it unbearable but also toxic and unhealthy, but you know you love the person, you may want to seek professional help in order to resolve the issue. Professionals and psychologist should be able to give proper insight on the matter and steer you to the kind of direction you want your relationship to go, be it to fully break up or work things out.
The Takeaway: You, And Your Demanding Relationship
When you're in a demanding relationship, it's easy to think that there's no solution to your woes. However, it's important to remember that having a demanding relationship is just you and your partner being in a state in your partnership where you've yet to iron out a few kinks.
This doesn't make the situation impossible to resolve, but rather makes it quite the perfect opportunity for you two to resolve this properly and come out stronger. Coping mentally is entirely possible in the situation, as the above have shared.